Unrealistic Perfectionism

Highly motivated players can be too hard on themselves.

Unrealistic perfectionism is stressful. It is, unfortunately, quite common amongst the driven super-achiever types that populate the high-performance tennis academies where high goals can leave them anxious and stressed.

These players are perfectionists and never satisfied for long even with their tournament wins or strong performances. They look at players ranked above them as proof that they are not doing as well as they should.

They will tell me, “I should have beaten so and so.” or “I am playing so much better in practice than in tournaments. I should be doing better and ranked higher.” No matter what their ranking is, they are dissatisfied, thinking they are somehow remiss and ought to be higher.

A key is to learn to really enjoy your successes.

With these highly motivated individuals their strong points are also their weak points. Having high goals and being powerfully motivated drives them to work extraordinarily hard, so they get better than most people at everything they do. Very admirable!

But the downside is that they can be unreasonably hard on themselves. They are marvelous people, but they don’t realize how marvelous they are. Dissatisfaction with their…